A great number of us wish that we could be more charismatic and charming – I know I do – and the ability to be able to ‘charm’ someone and to get them eating out of our hands is no doubt one that is highly useful. It’s not just a means to an end though; being charming is highly rewarding in and of itself as it allows you to command an audience, to gain respect and to enjoy the adoration of the masses.
We all want to be charming though and charismatic, but doing that is quite difficult when it’s hard to know precisely what charisma or charm actually are. How can you become something without first defining it? Here then we will look at answering the question: what are charm and charisma?
What Does it Mean to Be Charming?
Being charming is somewhat less abstract that being charismatic. Essentially this means being able to act in a gentlemanly or lady like manner to make the other person feel good and thereby be more of a smooth operator. Someone charming typically would kiss the hand of a woman they met, hold open a door, tell funny jokes and pay the person compliments without it coming off as sleazy or just a means to an end.
In other words, if you want to come off as charming then you need to charm the person you’re with which means they feel great about themselves. Treat a person with the utmost respect and do what you can to make them smile and you will be remembered as having been charming. Being charming is a great way to help you meet members of the opposite sex because you will be making them feel good about themselves and because you will be paying them a lot of attention, both of which are exactly how you want to feel when you fancy someone (flirting itself can also be charming).
What Does it Mean to Be Charismatic?
Being charismatic meanwhile is something you don’t necessarily do one on one, and it’s not something that can so easily be replicated through doing the right things and just making a person feel good. Arguably charisma can be practiced but generally true charisma is something you are born with.
This is basically the ability to be more captivating and entertaining when you speak and so to command an audience whenever you open your mouth. It’s the ability to amuse and impress when you aren’t necessarily performing, and it’s this aura that will make people want to be around you or want to listen to what you say more intently.
An example of someone charismatic might be Will Smith. There’s a guy who when he talks comes across as confident, witty, humorous, intelligent and authoritative all at once. The way he gesticulates and his generally relaxed attitude mixed with the things he’s saying mean that you want to listen when he talks. Obama too is someone who is ‘classically’ charismatic, as is Arnold Schwarzenegger and as was Bruce Lee.
While you might not be able to learn charisma, you can certainly improve upon it by focussing on improving your confidence – as soon as you do what you say will come across better and people will listen more. At the same time if you take acting lessons or similar you will learn to better relax into a ‘performance’ and project your voice in an authoritative manner.