To nobody’s surprise, there are truckloads of individuals out there who fear of falling in love for reasons best known to them. Almost everyone out there have their own set of reasons for the fear. Statistics suggest that nearly 250,000 individuals in the United States alone fear of falling in love. Basically, fear of falling in love is a phobia known as philophobia. Usually, individuals suffering from philophobia wouldn’t mind crossing any limits to avoid falling in love. More than often, victims refrain from having long conversations with other individuals in the fear that the long conversation would result into a love affair.
While some are afraid of the consequences of love, there are others who fear of the whole drama that love creates. It’s believed that this fear stems from a failed relationship in the past. Often, a miserable relationship experienced by an individual develops some kind of fear in the victim’s mind, which scares the sufferer from falling in love ever again. These individuals generally develop a negative frame of mind towards love. He/she tends to believe that all relationships in life have a miserable ending.
What one should realize over here is that all relationships may not fail, just like all relationships may not necessarily work. The reason for the past relationship failure may have to do with the fact that the victim was not involved in the right relationship. Just like any other experience in life, one should only learn from their bad relationship experience and not give rise to false beliefs that can further traumatize one’s life. Getting rid of the false belief system is the key to eradicate the fear of falling in love.
In order to get rid of the fear, you will have to proactively meet more people in your life. Slowly and gradually, you will see a positive change in your thought process. You don’t have to call people out on dates after the very first few visits. Just hang in there and keep meeting new people and call the right one out for a date at your own pace. Remember, you won’t be able to kill your fear overnight, but you will certainly be able to get rid of it over a period of time, provided you take some proactive measures from your end as mentioned above.
If you think, you won’t be able to help yourself out; there is no need to feel dejected. In some cases, the negative belief system is deep rooted. Over here, individuals would feel the need of some external help to get rid of the thoughts that are holding a person back. Certain therapies can be of great help over here. A good therapist will analyze your past relationship experiences, and will accordingly offer you an appropriate solution to deal with the fear of falling in love. Certain mental exercises and other relaxing techniques are usually recommended to the patients.
In some cases, certain drugs may be prescribed to the sufferer to get rid of the fear. Usually, anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills are advised to the patients. An individual taking these pills will find it easier to communicate with new people. Remember, love is a beautiful feeling in itself. There is no point depriving oneself from the wonderful feeling of love. You should get rid of the troublesome phobia of love as soon as possible so that you can fall back in love once again to make the most of your life.
This has been so me, Only I have been able to fall in love, But I have been so hurt that Yeah I think its for other people and not me, I think my feelings make men throw me away like garbage becasue that is what usually happens as soon as you feel something or things get real and are more than a fantasy.
So many men only want a fantasy and seem to hate anything more. Getting left in the snow crying when your pregnant dont help, Having your own real father tell you he cant have a relationship with you becasue of girl friend dont help, Yes every pain and heart ache only increases the fear.
But you still kind of know it cant be normal, You see other people together all the time. You just think that you alone have a curse.
This article was a great help on my research paper on philophobia and its amazing how much you can get out of one article.
This was very helpful. Especially the last paragraph of the article. Thank you very much!
My friend has this and I was wondering if I can do anything to help her. She likes me and I like her but she says that this is stopping her from being happy. What can I do?
@Brock sounds to me like all you two need to do, is to get together. She’s probably not happy about the situation because she’s not with you, giving that empty longing feeling.